Carmerio Offends Someone (But Not Really)

I am not a cool person. By ANY stretch of the imagination. Instead of breaking it down to you in witty prose (which would make me seem cooler than I am just by being witty) I will provide you with this short anecdote with only one moral: I am not fit to communicate in an capacity with other human beings.




It all started when a friend of mine--who had been tweetjoking recently about this website--tweeted the following tweet:

(for the record, she tweeted: "I had a dream today that I met Justin Bieber. What does that mean?")


Myself, being a social imbecile, thought it would be hilarious to draw a comparison to that website, Lesbians Who Look Like Justin Bieber, and replied as such:

(For the record, I, for some reason, thought 'That you look like a lesbian?' would be an appropriate response.)

Yeah, I'm starting to realize why I've been told my name should be 'hate' instead of Kate.

Anyway, my good friend Dye_go --I am still unsure if he is the good guy or the bad guy in all this, pointed out how lame it is to tell someone they look like a lesbian. Especially when they've just confessed to dreaming about Justin Bieber. And especially when this person hasn't exactly come to you with this information, but had just casually tweeted it. But especially when they have entire Facebook albums dedicated to women with short, edgy hair cuts because that's just something she's very passionate about. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

Anyway, the following is FURTHER proof of my social imbecility--IF in fact that is a word.

From Twitter to Facebook, people. The awkwardness ensues and is only ended by this lady's grace.

Kate Carmerio to Casanova April 9 at 3:35am

So, that reply tweet I sent you was in reference to that ‘Lesbians who look like Justin Bieber’ website. I figured you’d get it and it’d be fine and worst case scenario was it’s not that funny, but then Dye_go was all “That was BOLD.” And I was all “Waaa?” and he was all “That tweet. That was BOLD.” And I was all “I meant that website! I’m sure Casanova knows what I meant.” And he was all “You better HOPE. It was so BOLD” and I was like “Waaaa?!?!?” and he kept saying “BOLD!” and I was all “I’m pretty sure she posted it on her facebook AND THEN I COULDN’T FIND IT and then I was like “WILL SHE GET IT! She’ll get it, right!?” and then he admitted to be joking the whole time to get me all worked up about offending you because I always get worked up about offending people. BUT NOW I’M WORKED UP.

So, just for good measure: Hey, Casanova! There’s this website that’s been going around the interwebs that compares photos of lesbians to photos of Justin Bieber to imply that the two share both a sense of fashion and hair style choices. Seeing as you dreampt about meeting Mr. Bieber, perhaps your mind is telling you you look like a lesbian—what with that philosophy that everyone in your dream represents some part of you and the recent popularity of the site. Ha, ha-ha, Ha! What fun.

p.s. Not that you look like a lesbian. I don’t even know what a lesbian WOULD look like, because I don’t SEE people like that. Not that I would CARE if you looked like a lesbian, or that I think YOU would care if you looked like a lesbian which you MIGHT because as I said previously, I don’t even KNOW what one LOOKS like because I’m so OPEN MINDED.


p.p.s. Don’t tell Dye_go he won.


p.p.p.s.I was gonna comment PRE-tweet on your profile picture saying 'you're looking very Shane today' and now I'm not sure if that would have helped or hindered our little situation.


Kate.

This was then followed up, thank god, by her reply.

Casanova to Kate Carmerio April 9 at 10:06am

Bahahahaha, oh man. Okay, I promise I won't tell him. I have seen the website. I first saw it several weeks ago, and have been following it on my RSS feed ever since. I've even shared it with my actual lesbian friends, just to make sure they're cool with it. So yes, I did get it. It may have been construed as 'BOLD' by people who don't get it, but we shan't worry about them.

And, honestly, apart from some weird work-related anxieties, and a Muslim family living in a garden shed, most of my dream was about me trying to get my picture taken with Mr. Bieber so I could send it in to the website.
I have recently cut my hair so that I look less like Mr. Bieber, but possibly more like a lesbian. Not that I know what a lesbian is supposed to look like, because I, too, am OPEN MINDED.

P.S. I would have taken, "You're looking very Shane today," to have been a wonderful compliment.

Casanova

So basically, I'm just a big loser.

-Carmerio